Avoid Tough Questions

I keep skipping the uncomfortable ones subconsciously.. the one's I have already written too many poems about
day 7-10 is all the same person.. Damn, Okay.

Day 11.
uhh. its not complete..its not going to be.. this is what happened when i wrote..interestingly.. raw writing even when its horrible process and stress and this is what happens to many of us somedays.. so fuck it.


It is an anxious afternoon
in the city of brothers we love
I try to pay attention to only the good things
as I miss a bus back home to DC

If the "left us's"
if the dearly departed
are as omnipresent as we say
You already know these things

That our mother is more of a mess now
but that (fortunately, for the present) it has been worse
That I watched a set of twins walk by as I chewed up time
and wondered what it would have been like
to be born with a mirror
That sometimes it would almost be good to forget that i have a sister
along with the lessons it has taught me

I got a means of reflection,
when I was 14 I knew what i would look like at 18
you showed me all the good I would do
and all too often the mistakes I could not handle


1. No matter how many times you are hurt do not become bitter
...on the outside, we both know it makes us feel ugly and that our means for beauty are limited


2.Do Not love men who do not matter
Staying true to this creed is making a harder sound as life breaks me piecemeal, it has only meant that along with him I have let go of something vital

3.Do not lie

It is perfectly clear to me at this point in writing that I am bullshitting so I will not finish this piece, I don't know if anyone is worth of hearing what I actually have to say to my sister it is certainly not worth fucking up in the frame of this or sacrificing or using as a writing warm up so fuck this





Now that I know this morning what bullshitting in my writing feels like (or am rather reminded) I can get to my shit and start my poetic day on my bus back to DC, word.Guhhh.. that was interesting?? see.. Wtf.. yea, whatever.. processing..damn rereading it.. guess who's bitter.. shet